7 surefire ways from the famous psychologist Larisa Surkova.
– How, are you still dressing a child in diapers ?! I taught you to potty when I was 9 months old! – my mother was indignant.
For a long time, the topic of diapers has been a sore point in our family. She was also warmed up by a large army of relatives.
“I should already go to the potty,” they repeated when their son was one year old.
– My child does not owe anything to anyone, – I once barked, tired of making excuses, and the theme of the pot disappeared.
Now my son is 2,3 years old, and yes, throw tomatoes at me, he still wears diapers.
At the same time, I began to plant the child on a potty at the age of 7 months. Everything went well until the son learned to walk. It was no longer possible to put him on the pot – screams, tears, hysteria began. This period dragged on for a long time. Now the son is not afraid of the pot. However, for him, he is more of a toy, which he drives around the apartment, sometimes – a hat or a basket for storing “Lego”.
The child still prefers to do his business in a diaper, even if just a couple of minutes ago, at the request of his mother, he sat on the potty for a long time and patiently.
On the forums, the topic of a pot among mothers is like a vanity fair. Every second person is in a hurry to boast: “And mine has been going to the potty since 6 months!” That is, the child is not even on his feet, but he somehow gets to the pot. Probably, he also takes a newspaper to read – such a little genius.
In general, the more often you read the forums, the more you drive yourself into the “bad mother” complex. Saved me from self-flagellation known child and family psychologist Larisa Surkova.
The pot is such a controversial topic. You say that you have to teach after a year – a fool, if up to a year, also a fool. I am always for the interests of the child. Recently my youngest daughter turned one year old, and at the same time we put out the pot. Let’s play, show examples and wait. The child must mature. You don’t empty yourself in your sleep, do you? Because they are ripe. And the baby is not yet.
1. He himself can sit down and get up from the pot.
2. He sits on it without resisting.
3. He retires during the process – behind the curtain, behind the bed, etc.
4. It can stay dry for at least 40-60 minutes.
5. He can use words or actions to indicate the need to go to the pot.
6. He doesn’t like being wet.
Do not worry if a child under the age of three wears diapers all the time. I’ll reveal the secret. The child will go to the potty one day. You can wait and kill yourself, or you can just watch. All children are different and all mature in due time. Yes, in our time, many ripen later, but this is not a disaster.
Only 5 percent of children actually have potty problems. If a child over three years old has not mastered toilet skills, it is possible:
– you are too early or traumatic, through the screams you began to potty train him;
– he experienced potty stress. Someone scared: “if you don’t sit down, I will punish”, etc .;
– there was disgust from the sight of their excrement;
– scared when they took tests, for example, on the ovarian leaf;
– you attach too much importance to the issues of the pot, react violently, scold, persuade, and the child understands that this is a good method to manipulate you;
– quite an extreme option – the child has signs of physical and mental developmental delay.
1. Determine the exact reason. If it’s you, then you need to devalue the reaction. Stop making noise and swearing. Make an indifferent face or express your emotions in a whisper.
2. Talk to him! Deal with the reasons, explain what exactly you do not like his refusal of the pot. Ask “would it be good” if mom pees in her pants? Find out if he likes being dirty and wet.
3. If the child asks for a diaper, show how many are left in the pack: “Look, there are only 5 pieces, but there are no more. We will now go to the potty. ” Say it very calmly, without scolding or shouting.
4. Read “potty” fairy tales. These can be downloaded for free on the Internet.
5. Start a “pot diary” and draw your story about the pot. The baby sat on it, so you can give out a sticker. Didn’t sit down? It means that the pot is lonely and sad without a child.
6. If there is a suspicion that the child is lagging behind in development, contact a psychologist or neurologist.
7. If you know that traumatic stories for the psyche have happened to the child, it is also better to go to a psychologist. There is no such possibility? Then search the Internet for therapeutic fairy tales on your topic, for example, “The Tale of the Fear of the Pot.”